Quina's Adventures
by Luminous Bedpost
Summary: Quina, our background FF9 character runs into many friends and foes, such as moogles, giant frog ladies and much, much more.
1. The Moogle from the Mental Institution

Quina's Adventures: The Moogle from the Mental Institution 

**By Luminous Bedpost**

**O**ne fine day, in Mognet Central, there was a moogle. I must say, there were many moogles, but this one was... _different._ Kupokins was a moogle; alike the rest, but his mental thoughts were what made him different. Kupokins had spent the last 3 years in the Mognet Central Institution, because of his twisted and warped mind. For starters, Kupokins hated Kupo nuts, which made him and outcast all by itself. Second of all, he was _sure_ he wasn't a moogle, but rather a brave Knight of Pluto. His distant cousin Moggly, had envisioned himself as an oglop so obviously, insanity ran in the family.

So, on this fine day, Kupokins was taking a walk when all of the sudden, he walked straight into Quina, the big, scary frog eating genderless thing.

"Oouf! Oh! Lookie! Moogly!" Quina grasped the tiny moogle into its reach and hugged him.

"Hey! Hey! I'm not a moogle, kupo! I'm a brave Knight of Pluto!" The moogle bit the genderless creature that had came from the Qu tribe and jumped out of its reach.

"OUCHIES! Hey moogly! Looks like moogly you does! Yes Yes!" Quina poked at Kupokins, and then licked the moogle.

"Wha-What!? What are you doing!" Kupokins jumped back, kicked the Qu tribe member and squealed madly.

"Uckies! Uckies! Moogly tastes of kupo nuts! UCKIES!" Quina screeched, as it ran around in a circle, crying out words that... well, never _ever_ existed.

"Well, it's your fault, kupo, for licking me you... you... PEANUT!" Kupokins kicked at Quina again, and stomped off, untill he realized something.

"OH MY GODNESS! You're a peanut, kupo!" Kupokins hugged Quina, because Kupokins adored peanuts.

"No, No, No! Moogly got wrong! Quina a member of Qu tribe! Quina no peanut!" Quina smacked the small moogle off of it, and hopped backwards.

"Yes, you are, kupo! You're a giant peanut!" Kupokins bounced about, and squealed with his kupo-joy.

"NO! Quina a Qu tribe member! NO PEANUT! BAD MOOGLY!" Quina screamed, its voice booming with its anger.

"YES YOU ARE! And your name is not Quina. It's Moogly-Peanut! KUPO!" Kupokins flew around Quina.

"NOOO! I Qu tribe member! Name is Quina and you stupid moogly!" Quina screeched again, bouncing up and down.

**J**ust then a little mog with a blue police uniform came up to the large, scary, genderless creature.

"Is this moogle bothering you, dear... um... thing?" The Officer asked, glaring at the insane mog with disgust.

"Yes, Yes! Moogly bother Quina indeed! Calling me peanut! Making Quina angry!" Quina bounced up and down, emphasizing its current state of anger.

"I was only stating the truth, kupo!" Kupokins yelled.

"Well, Kupokins, I think you need to go back to the M.I. because you're obviously not ready to face the... _real_ world yet, kupo." The officer took Kupokins, and handcuffed the poor little mog.

"Bye-Bye Moogly!" Quina waved and walked off, in search of new foods.

**_The End._**


	2. Searching for Frogs

**Quina's Adventures #2: Searching for Frogs.**

**By Luminous Bedpost**

**O**ne fine day in the Mist continent, our genderless friend, Quina was in search for its favourite food... frogs.

So, Quina was walking into the Qu Marshes, as I've stated before, looking for frogs. Quina was also hoping to visit Quan, its master.

"Froggies, Froggies, Froggies..." Quina sang as it skipped deep into the marshes, where it knew the frogs lied. Or so Quina thought...

As soon as Quina got there, it gasped. **_THERE WAS NO MORE FROGS!_**

"NO, NO, NO! Where Froggies be?" Quina scrambled around, looking around for any sign of a frog. She never even saw one. Untill a deep manly voice boomed, that is.

"Looking for **_ME_**?" The voice boomed. Quina span around to meet eyes with a giant frog lady, who was so scary, Zidane would have ran away like a little girl, screaming. But, Quina was much braver then Zidane.

"Ohhhhhh! Giant froggy! Me eat you!" Quina bounced up and down, happy that there was a frog in the pond, and a giant one at that.

"_NO!_ You have eaten my babies, so I shall eat you!" The frog tried to snatch Quina up, but our genderless friend, dodged the attempt.

"Yeah-huh! Quina eat froggy! Froggy no eat Quina! That silly!" Quina giggled and then bounced around some more, wondering how to eat this giant, delicious looking frog.

"How dare you think of eating me! I will eat you, who ate my precious babies!" The frog grabbed Quina, and held Quina to its mouth just about to eat it when...

"HEY! How about eating this biatch!" Vivi ran in, quickly casting Flare on the frog, and unknowingly, on Quina as well.

**T**he frog fell over, dead from Vivi's spell, and Quina, toasted, and it's hat on fire.

"**_HOT!_** Hat on fire! Off-off!" Quina ran around Vivi, untill he finally used Water on Quina.

"You okay?" Vivi walked up to Quina and smiled.

"BAD! BAD! BAD! Froggy was food! Now froggy burnt and yucky! And Vivi use bad words! BAD VIVI!" Quina smacked Vivi, making the nine-year-old fall over.

"HEY! Your so fecked up I'm gonna kill you..." Vivi shook his fist at Quina just as Zidane walked into the scene.

"Hey you guys—Oh my god! IT'S A _GIANT FROG LADY_! **_RUNNNNNN!_**" Zidane ran away, in pure terror.

Both Quina and Vivi laughed and walked away behind him, leaving the frog lady dead... or so they thought.

_**The End.**_


	3. Mistreatments of the Miserably Poor

**Quina's Adventures: Mistreatments of the Miserably Poor.**

**By Luminous Bedpost**

_Well, the story is up! Hope you guys enjoy my Quina fan-based story. I am a total Quina fan, Freya Fan and also a Vivi fan; so expect a lot of appearances from Vivi and Freya. Also, there may be some Zidane making fun of, but that's only because I think its funny when he does silly, girly things. This is not **bashing**. It is just making the story more humorous. Please Review!_

**L.B.**

**H**ello people, yes, yes! I Quina, main character of story! Quina very misunderstood, you know. Frog eating make me look gross and genderless issues make Quina friendless. Quina's only friend Vivi, Freya and Zidane. All others think Quina fat frog eating gross bum. What you not understand is that Quina have feelings too! Quina feel the same as you. Quina cry, laugh, smile, frown... Quina have emotions. You people insensitive and cruel to Quina. Quina think that rude and disrespectful.

How you feel if Quina called you big fat booger with hairys? You cry, yes! And if Quina say you eating macaroni and cheese yucky, you mad, yes-yes! So therefore, again I clear, that I very mistreated! So— _FROGGY!_

"Froggy, Froggy, FROGGY! Come back here froggy! Quina eat you up! Quina eat you up good!" 

**M**mm... yummy froggy. Anyways, as I saying, I think Quina in needs of more love. Quina loves love. So, Quina want you review reasons why you love or hate Quina and Quina will reply back to them once Quina gets more than 10 reasons. Quina hope gets more than ten.

_N_ow Quina give back to author, so we begin story!

_**E**hem. _Thank you Quina. Now we go onto our story, which involves our three... _odd_ heroes in Alexandria doing a _musical_ with Zidane's old friends from Tantalus.

_T_he play was a new one. Thought up of by the group. The title of it was "Mistreatments of the Miserably Poor." It was, what they called, a masterpiece. The only new thing about this was, that it was a musical. None of the performers ever had done a musical in their acting careers, so this was an interesting time for them. 

**N**ow I shall recap this amazing musical done by our heroes in an orderly way that will make a whole lot more sense.

Velvet red curtains draw back, revealing a few old and wrecked looking houses, and a amazing blue background with the two moons. 

A man in a cloak walks in, his soft blonde hair bouncing with each step he took. The man faced the crowed and addressed the crowd. 

Zidane: You highness, Lords and Ladies, Noblemen and Noblewomen, Girls and Boys. Welcome to "Mistreatments of the Miserably Poor."! Please take a seat and enjoy our fabulous show!

Day becomes night as many villagers fill the scene, scrambling around in a disorderly fashion. 

Ruby: Oh no! Oh no! It's that time again!

Marcus: Oh dear! Oh dear! It's that time I fear!

Steiner: Oh yes! Oh yes! Now don't make a fess!

People of the village: Its time to pay our taxes, today!

Vivi: I fear! Oh yes I fear! My mother cannot pay!

Steiner: Oh really? What a shame. I guess I can take her away!

Zidane: People! People of the village! Don't fret, and do not shout! Don't worry all about! I'm here to get you out of debt today!

Vivi: Really? Oh really? Then please save my mother, today!

Zidane: Sir Rusty, my friend, have you lost your way? Collecting the taxes may be so much fun, but its funner to take them away!

Zidane snatches the bag from Steiner's pouch and saves Vivi's mother. 

Vivi: Oh dear sir! Dear Sir! Thank god for you...

Villagers: TODAY!

Curtain closes for an intermission. 

**To be continued.**


End file.
